There is a game I was introduced to many years ago called Essence. It is played by a group of people who determine one guesser and one person who is “it”. The guesser tries to determine who the “it” person is by asking each individual in the group questions about the essence of this person.
“If this person were a shoe, what type of shoe would they be? If this person were a natural disaster, what kind of disaster would they be? If this person were a car, what car would they be? If this person were a planet, which planet would they be?”
It’s a bit abstract and can get dangerous. For example, no one ever wants to be Yugo. The trick is to have answers that are based on the intrinsic nature or indispensable quality of the individual. If this person were Charlie Sheen, he would be some kind of purple glittered platform shoe, a tornado, a McLaren F1 and Venus in my humble opinion.
If I were a planet, I would be Mercury. Mercury is the innermost and smallest planet in the Solar System. It orbits the sun once about every 88 Earth days and similar to my dance moves, has the highest eccenticity of all the Solar System planets. This means that its orbit is pretty darn slow and irregular.
I began my journey of refinement almost four years ago and did not really pick up momentum until three years ago. My refinement has been a slow one. I was discontent with the comfortable, probable and unfulfilled life I was leading. My connections to the world were glittered with misaligned relationships I had invested in like a blinded baron. I did not feel the exciting tension of the tipping point when your life is always on the edge of advancement. I believe there is perfection in balancing that tension, but I did not know that perfection.
Transformation became my goal, but I landed at refinement. I like to call it my capital refinement, as it’s pretty important and a huge investment in myself, something most people are not willing to do. I thought my goal was to create a thorough change and while many changes in my life have been pretty impactful, they have not been dramatic. They have simply helped to redefine the direction I wanted to be going towards in the first place. As I entered into unchartered space, I began to challenge myself and these challenges resulted in changes – physically, financially, emotionally and mentally. They have made my personal orbit erratic at times. I found myself in situations, in places, with people, that reshape my approach around my center – my advancement. I would try something new and if I liked it, would steer my direction towards more of it. If I didn’t like it, I would bounce back into my orbit, but changed, in that I had still gained something new…an experience, knowledge, or even discovery of a new opportunity to explore or discovery that I really didn’t like something. I learned more about where I wanted to be and why I had limited myself in getting there. I realized that I had been over looking relationships that mattered and not identifying the connections that were toxic and unsupportive. I figured out how to decrease the toxicity and am still working on how to continue to enrich and grow more love with the most valued relationships in my life.
The most important thing I have learned is that this eccentric orbiting is necessary and helps me in advancing who I am. I intend to continue to orbit erratically, pressing to stay at that tipping point just at a slower pace. Mercury makes it around the sun in about 88 days after all. When I make it to my goals, it will be with deviations and through unconventional means most of the time. I hope to continue to stay in orbit, just a bit erratic at times.